Hi
Here are a few examples of some fabulous writing from Y6. They have been entered into the Young Writers’ Awards. The challenge was to write the best story, in 500 words or less, about being transported to the year 3017 (see details below). It is probably too late to enter – the closing date is Friday the 5th of May – but we can have a competition in school. Please send me your stories and the best will get a purple form and an extra prize for the very best…
Here is Ethan’s story, he is in Ms Kildea’s class and has posted lots of very imaginative and descriptive writing pieces this year.
I woke up in the morning, but it seemed different, I heard something coming up the stairs. Then it stopped. My door opened. It was a… robot!
His body was made of metal shiny as a silver coin. It was as big as a full grown adult. With loads of buttons on its chest. Until then I hadn’t even realized my bed was floating. My calendar said it was 3017. I was in the future!
“Ethan!” Shouted my Mom. “Can I borrow your iPhone. I lost mine.” “Okay.” I replied. I went downstairs on a platform that took me down. “Here you go Mom.”
“What is this?” Exclaimed Mom.
“It’s an iPhone 7.” I answered back.
“iPhone 7! I thought we bought you an iPhone 7,654,329,078.” Looking confused. “Any way I received your school work and homework so go and start it.” Said Mom.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
” Your teacher is on the computer.” Mom replied. I went into the living room which had virtual reality games in it, and a TV that had an extra dimension, smell! There was also a weird looking machine in the corner which said Teleporter on it. I walked inside to look around. I pressed a blue button and nothing happened.
“Pop quiz.” Shouted Mom from the kitchen. ” What is the largest city in the world.”
“Uhhhh, New York City.” I answered. Suddenly, the machine began to shake.
“Teleporting to New York City,” said the machine in a robotic device. It was voice activated!
I found myself in the middle of New York City. Many things changed: The buildings were made out of a strange material, cars were flying, there were weird adds everywhere saying stuff like; stay at Hotel Chaira on Mars or new energy pill, makes you 20 times faster only for 1,000,000 galaxian credits. There was a humongous elevator in the middle that goes to the moon. There was a jet-park where people were flying in jet packs. I was tired and yawned. I then noticed there was no sun. Just a ginormous light hovering in dark space. I needed to get back home.I stepped back in the teleporter which was right next to me. I pressed the blue button and said Wilmington Street 4388. Nothing happened. I did it again. Nothing. I stepped out and saw a big out of order sign.
Now I have to try and get back home. I walked to a store selling jet packs and I managed to buy one for a dollar which to them seemed like a cool souvenir. So they decided to make a trade with me. I pulled a lever and I ascended. I pushed it forward and I went forward. This wasn’t going to be that hard. After a long time, I finally got home.
When I got there I realized my house was hovering in mid-air! I flew threw the window and pretended to be studying. “This won’t be so bad.” I told myself.
Well done Ethan – incredibly interesting…
And here is Mara’s (also in 6B and coincidentally the winner of Caxton’s Got Talent Y5/6 category for her splendid Spanish dancing!).
This morning my mum has gone out with her friends and she has told me to do lots of different tasks in the house .
Whilst I am doing all these tasks, my brother and sister are still asleep! Well, I started off asking the wardrobe what I should wear. He said he would look up the forecast and call me. Whilst the wardrobe was selecting my clothes, I made plans with my friends for the afternoon.
We decided to take a trip to the moon (don’t worry it’s a virtual trip). I then start giving orders through my galaxy watch to warn all the different appliances in the house that they need to be finished before mum got back. A noise warns me that my brother and sister are awake and hungry – so I send a message to the microwave in my galaxy watch to prepare their favourite breakfast.
Almost at the same time I receive a message from the fridge warning us that there is no milk! I quickly tell the fridge to order more from the supermarket.
Finally I to go to the bathroom, but on my way I am interrupted by something really horrible. There was soap everywhere! The bubbles were exploding and covering everything with soap. I even saw soap coming out of the washing machine!! Panicking I try to contact the cleaning machine.
My own worst nightmare was happening. It was horrific and frightening! My galaxy watch was going crazy in front of my eyes!!!!! I rushed through the house and saw all the crazy things going on. The dish washer was expelling water, the fridge was sending messages to the microwave so it would cook popcorn, the cinema room was showing a documentary of cows dancing in a valley and the music kept repeating my brother’s favorite song ‘boogie boogie, boogie ‘.
This was a disaster! How could I stop all the machines going crazy and prepare breakfast? I started opening the fridge and saw some eggs I thought I could use. I looked it up in internet for some egg recipes and found out that I needed to put something called oil and wait until it got hot, before throwing the egg in. It looked easy but believe me it wasn’t. The oil went everywhere and I almost burned myself. How on earth was I going to prepare breakfast for all of us?
Just as I thought I was going to crazy too my mum walked in with breakfast and used her special remote control to turn off all the machines – she just smiled at me and everything was back to normal.
Well done Mara – lots of description and expanding. And thanks for enetering those Ms Kildea.
SO CAN YOU WRITE A SIMILAR STORY? ARE YOU UP FOR THE CHALLENGE?
Anna 6B
Anna
This is my story I hope you enjoy!!!!
The future.
It was a shivering night in London and the mad scientist was about to finish his latest invention : The time machine! Stitch Head, one of his oldest creations , was looking through the dark ,dark hole. Stitch Head had been there for more than two hours and seen every thing his master had done.
After another half an hour, finally Doctor Grey went to sleep. While doctor Grey was sleeping Stitch Head had by accident pushed a button. Suddenly the machine started to rumble and fumble and…
BOOM!!! The machine had sucked him in there. Stitch Head was going faster than a lightning, but then…he stopped . And then ….BOOM!! CRASH!!! He crashed into something solid .
He woke up finding himself somewhere sunny.The first thing he saw was a little dog floating around. He didn’t realize he was in the future until he saw a space ship.
“I think…I think I’m in the future,” he managed to mumble to himself.
Stitch Head, in his entire life, hadn’t done anything special so he decided to stay a little while and look around. The first thing he saw, after getting up, was a big big building that was flying in the middle of nowhere. Stitch Head was very surprised as he never went out of the tower and it was the first thing he’d ever saw, apart of that boring old tower. He didn’t know where to go and he didn’t know anyone, so he just went were his eyes looked.
After walking two hours and looking around (that by the way he was very surprise to see how the future had changed ) he got an idea of how the future looked. And then he saw a poster that said, “Do you feel lonely? Does nobody notice you? Well, not anymore because thanks to machines doing everything now everybody will notice you! Win it now!!” This can be my chance, he thought, I can win that and the professor will notice me .
In the salon he saw one old lady, two women with flying dogs and twenty two men with the same style. Suddenly, a man appeared from nowhere. He wasn’t very neat, he had a silly hat gigantic boots and a perfect smile.
“Good morning, ladys and gentlemen and um…… Stitches?” he announced politely.
“As you know we are all here because nobody notices us, but not any more with this machine – we would be noticed, now step inside!” he pronounced .
Every one was in a hurry to step in .
After they stepped in, the machine went down and up and left and right. And at that moment he realized he’d made the biggest mistake in his life. Stitch Head tummy started to rumble and fumble and then….. BOOM ! CRASH!
He appeared in the same spot as before. Nothing had changed except Stitch Head’s mind .
‘I will never look at posters and believe them.’
caxtoncollege
Fabulous story Anna, lots of brilliant description and a wide variety of punctuation used.